Coaching, as an industry, has a million-and-one problems. I have done my fair share of hemming and hawing about them, debating what to do about them, and stewing about what it means for “my industry” and “the reputation of the industry as a whole.”
What I have come to understand is that my job is to solve exactly zero of these problems.
My job is not to fix the coaching industry. My job is to serve my clients and give generously to those who value what I share. Full stop.
Imagine, for example, going into an online coaching forum and asking a question about strategies for booking clients, and instead of receiving answers and guidance being told you are “giving your power away” by asking the question.
This is an example of a recent trend I’ve noticed in some coaching spaces. Coaches responding to clients who ask how to do something strategically or how those who’ve achieved success in a specific area did what they did … and the coach responds by telling the client that their question is crowdsourcing (which apparently implies a negative connotation) – even going so far as to say that asking such questions is a symptom of “giving your power away.”
LISTEN. If you choose to work with me, I won’t do this.
Here are 10 reasons I won’t pull this crap, er, I’m mean, 10 reasons I won’t do this:
1.) It is a thinly veiled way of sidestepping the question and belittling the client (all while saying you are empowering them).
2.) Asking for help is an act of BRAVERY and will always be treated as such in my world.
3.) As a client of mine, you can bank on always being received in a way that has you knowing with certainty that you don’t need to edit yourself, that you are safe to ask anything and know you will be responded to with the highest level of support I am able to provide to you. This is what I will deliver. I hold nothing back. Every question has an answer, and if I don’t know the answer and you don’t know the answer, together we will find how to get you the answers you need.
4.) Investigating (a.k.a crowdsourcing) others’ actions as you determine the approach you will choose as you move forward, is smart. Learning from the experience of others is part of figuring things out. While there are many paths that can take you to the same place and you’ll never hear me say you *must* do it a certain way, if I can save you from going down roads I know are full of potholes, I most certainly will.
5.) If I know of a superhighway that takes you there (and I do know several fast-track paths that generally aren’t common knowledge), you can know with absolute confidence and certainty that I won’t withhold this either. To do so would be completely unethical, in my view.
5 more…
6.) It’s NOT an “either/or.” Either ‘ask what others have done and give your power away’ OR ‘don’t ask and be empowered to figure it out independently’ presents a choice built on false constructs. Lord knows, you don’t need any more BS to navigate! Especially from the very coach you hired to help you sort out the time-sucks and navigate around the nonsense. (Sigh.) I am here to help you spot and deconstruct BS constructs, not add to them!
7.) None of this needs to be made to mean that you can’t figure it out on your own.
8.) None of this needs to be made to mean that you don’t trust yourself.
9.) To be clear: As a professional, I hold no attachments to what actions you choose to take, or not take. I regularly tell clients, “take what you like and leave the rest.” As your coach, in addition to any strategic support, I will also be coaching you on the inner work around trusting yourself to make decisions, take aligned action, and figure it out as you go. You can know with confidence that I’m here for all of it.
10.) You are powerful, always.
Ready to work together? Let’s talk: www.sessionwithtara.com
Big love,
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