by Tara Sage | Mar 16, 2023 | Brules of Life, Coaching, Create Your Life!, Dream Acceleration, Manifestation, Tara Sage Coaching
On a good day, I felt restless. On a bad day, I felt like a caged animal.
Exasperated, I came home from work to my dark, musty, basement apartment – a glaring reminder that I was not just figuratively, but literally, underground. Drowning in student loan debt, I rarely answered my phone because collection agencies were calling me daily. Trying to find my way in the world wasn’t easy. Emotional and practical baggage of difficult family dynamics and estrangement seemed to be hitting me all at once. I felt like a victim of circumstances, dealt an unfortunate hand, profoundly alone in my struggles.
The job I begrudgingly got at an Ivy League university to establish some stability, looked good on paper, but my soul was dying, a little more every day. If I had to sit through one more hour-long meeting that could have been communicated by an email, I was going to lose it. Things were done in inefficient ways for no reason other than it’s the way they’d always done it. This felt archaic to me, but rethinking conventions wasn’t welcomed or encouraged. Waiting for that clock on the wall to read 5:00 felt like an insult to my personal integrity and pride, not to mention that I’d finished my work hours earlier. And the starched button down shirt I wore, because I thought I should, felt like a straight-jacket, a costume that belonged to someone else – but not me.
I knew I couldn’t stay.
While going through the motions on all the things I thought I was supposed to do, I was losing myself. On autopilot, I’d drive to work, or the grocery store, or the gym (when I could get myself to go) feeling more and more disconnected from who I was. I wasn’t challenged. I wasn’t inspired. I felt contained, micro-managed, and caught in status quo games that I didn’t want to play.
I felt like I was drowning, and I knew no one was coming to save me.
Underneath my restlessness and frustration, was a growing sense that I was meant for MORE, that this couldn’t possibly be all I was meant to do, be, or have.
I knew I needed to take the reins and reshape my life, to reshape my reality, to figure out how to not live in a basement apartment forever, to create a life that was my own, that reflected the truth of who I was.
It was from that dark musty basement apartment, that I gazed out that teeny-tiny window with a view of the sidewalk and the tires of cars passing by … and I’d dream.
I dreamed of:
√ having the freedom to travel when and where I please
√ having my own location-independent company so that I could work from anywhere
√ a home with lots of natural light
√ becoming a bestselling author
√ wealth on my own terms
√ finding love
√ having time and energy for creativity and play
√ making a positive impact, serving others in meaningful ways that made their life better
√ being myself without boundaries.
The voice of my soul, and seeds of my own self-actualization, were surfacing.
There was a huge difference between the caged, soul-crushing, autopilot life I felt constrained and uninspired by, and my dreams. The problem was I couldn’t figure out how and where to find a bridge between the two.
A few things were missing, and when I finally figured those out, everything changed. Quickly.
What was missing was…
- Self-trust
- Belief that dreams my were possible – for not just other people, but for me
- A way to see and transform my blind spots and expand my thinking
I needed to step up for myself, rather than waiting around for things to change, or others to approve. I needed to go from complaining about what my life currently was to becoming the person that COULD and WOULD move out of it.
What I needed to learn was…
- How to manage my energy
- What to do with fear
- How to navigate naysayers
I needed the skills and support to take the REINS on my life, to listen to my heart, and really take ownership of the life I dreamed and envisioned for myself. To stop fear from running the show, I needed to get out of my head and shift my focus from all the seeming limits of my current circumstance to finding strategies and ways forward that I couldn’t yet see but chose to believe were there to be found.
What I needed to do was…
- Get the right support
- Take brave consistent action
- Show up fully for what I was saying I wanted
I needed support from someone who’d been there. And perspective OUTSIDE what I’d already tried, a shift out of what had created the life I had, and into creating the totally different life I wanted.
So, I got support. And I changed my thinking. And I became a different version of me.
Spoiler alert: It worked.
Not only have I achieved my “impossible” dreams and the freedom I so craved, I have built a business and a profoundly fulfilling, decades-long, career around helping others rethink conventions, chart their own course, live their dreams, rediscover themselves, and realize what’s possible.
I help you create the life you think you cannot have.
Your dreams, like mine, are fuel on your path to self-actualization.
The first step along the way to THAT life? Want the key to reclaiming what’s missing, to create everything you want for yourself, to finally make that change? >>> The Only Skill You Ever Need
xo,
P.S. Going after your dream life, finally living it, moving from your life now to the life you want to have – all of this can feel completely overwhelming! How do you know what you want? How do you GET what you want? Where do you start? How do you face all the uncertainty and that huge climb from where you are now to the life of your dreams?
There’s one skill that unlocks all the rest.
And my totally free and totally updated Only Skill You Ever Need guide and bonus chapter goes through exactly that.
Ready for that dream life of yours?
by Tara Sage | Mar 9, 2023 | Brules of Life, Coaching, Create Your Life!, Dream Acceleration, Tara Sage Coaching
Creating your life is an evolution, an ongoing expression of your freedoms and your being-ness.
Your life is the embodiment of your self-actualization.
Recognizing this, is the opposite of bypassing, and the opposite of avoiding.
The act of intentionally creating your life to be the reflection and expression of your freedoms, your potentials, your dreams, and the truth of who you are, is extraordinarily BRAVE.
Your life right now is the embodiment of your self-actualization (or lack thereof).
Your life right now is the barometer for your current level of self-actualization, AND your current level of self-abandonment.
This is true for you. This is true for me.
When I was in a job that I knew was all wrong for me…
When I felt trapped in a marriage that was full of dishonesty…
When home was a darky, musty, basement apartment…
When my soul longed to travel, but I stayed put…
… all of this was an affront to my soul.
… and ALL of this was glaring evidence of my own self-abandonment.
Whatever degree self-actualization is lacking in your life, is the same degree that self-abandonment is happening in your life.
A tough pill to swallow, but a truly powerful one too.
This is not about blame or shame. But it’s also not about pretending.
This kind of evidence-based self-inventory isn’t for the faint of heart.
Every example of self-abandonment is an opportunity to see what’s there.
To see, observe, learn from, and find fuel for change in the tangible evidence of your life’s creation, so far.
Seeing the YOU that is smack in the middle of it all – is POWERFUL – not because you are the blame center, but because you are the POWER center.
YOU are the common denominator. And you can therefore choose to move away from self-abandonment and towards self-actualization.
You can choose to move away from what doesn’t light you up, and towards what does.
You can choose to move away from fears about not enough, and towards enoughness.
You can choose to move away from “I can’t” and towards “watch me figure it out.”
Doing this requires a whole lot of courage, self-inquiry, and self-integrity – asking, and seeing: What is aligned for me? What isn’t aligned for me? What do I really really want? If I had one year to live, what would I do with it? And if I had one year to live, what would I stop doing immediately?
Let NOW be time to get to the heart of the matter.
Objectively identifying what’s what, being fiercely honest with yourself, and then consciously deciding to grow into being the person who would (re)align what’s not, is the journey of self-actualization.
Creating a life that reflects the truth of who you are, takes heart, and hutzpah. Not the “who” the world has told you to be, but who you ARE and the truth of your desires.
The work of self-actualization is not a strategy of separation.
It is not a way to distance yourself from the life you have.
It is not about positioning yourself as the victim of your circumstances.
It is not about shame or blame or pretending. (I said that already, but it’s worth repeating.)
And, truth be told, it’s a mission that is never done.
Until you leave this Earth, it’s an ongoing creation, moment by moment.
When on a mission of self-actualization, as long as you’re alive, there will always be “lag time” between who you ARE, and the life you’re creating to be a reflection of that being-ness, that person.
It is therefore not a fixed point, and it is not a destination. It is an expression. It is an evolutionary unfolding. It’s a journey of self-responsibility, of empowerment, of healing, and of doing what’s needed to shift any aspect of your life that isn’t for you.
Ultimately, this requires that you get intimate with yourself, and intimate with your life – both as it IS and as you wish it to be.
Step one is seeing what’s there. Stepping back to see the mirror that IS your life. Facing your life, perhaps as you never have before. And then, participating fully in its evolution and ongoing creation so that it can align that much more fully with the dreams in your heart and the truth of YOU – who you are here to be.
Love,
P.S. Going after your dream life, finally living it, moving from your life now to the life you want to have – all of this can feel utterly terrifying! How do you know what you want? HOW do you get what you want? How do you face all the uncertainty and that huge climb from where you are now to the life of your dreams?
There’s ONE SKILL that unlocks all the rest. >>> And my totally free and totally updated Only Skill You Ever Need guide and bonus chapter goes through exactly that.
Ready for that dream life of yours? It’s my gift to you.
by Tara Sage | Mar 2, 2023 | Coaching, Dream Acceleration, Tara Sage Coaching
Want to live your dreams? Here are three truth-bombs that will help:
(1) If you want your life to expand into living your dreams, if you want to create and achieve new results … you have to grow yourself.
(2) In order to realize your unique-to-you no-vacation-needed life, you must stop playing smaller than you are.
(3) In order to make your no-vacation-needed life REAL, you must step up and show up as the powerful creator that you are.
It’s not about being perfect, or unafraid, or knowing all the answers.
It IS about bringing curiosity, vision, bravery, conviction, determination, and resourcefulness to every action and decision going forward.
This is hard to do alone because fear and doubt (all normal) will try to take you out by overriding your deepest longings and callings, and defaulting to self-limiting beliefs that try to convince you that your current circumstances are a gauge for what’s possible.
The fear, the doubt, the belief in limitation: they’ll all feel SO REAL.
Perception is a strong thing.
The right support quickly gets your brain back to focusing on ‘how is this possible’.
The kind of support that CRACKS the perceptions of doubt that make every fear and ‘this just won’t work for me’ thought feel so real and true … is the exact kind of support that’s needed to help you quickly and easily shift focus and build new habits around ‘of course it’s happening for me’ beliefs, and ‘I’m stronger than my fears’ feelings, and ‘the actions I take now empower who I’m becoming’ self-perceptions.
^ This is the quickest path. It opens doors you didn’t know were there. Rather than spending your precious energy on worry, doubt, wondering what to do, and trying to figure it all out by yourself, having the right support makes ALL the difference!
As one client of mine put it, “Private coaching is having ONE person in the whole world that not only completely “gets” you, but also fully supports the best possible version of YOU.”
And another who said: “I’ve always had an “I can do it myself” attitude but I followed my heart and took that first step to reach out and connect with Tara. The moment Tara asked me to imagine my dream day, my life began to head in a new direction. I knew I had made the right decision … which has turned out to be the first of many “right” decisions.”
Similar to how a personal trainer, or tutor, customizes based on what will serve you best, meeting you exactly where you ARE and helping you get where you want to go … I am here to provide you with customized support to create the life you want.
You’ve probably seen me offering free 1:1 assessment calls lately. They tend to book out pretty quickly because they’re so powerful. This is the last time I’m going to offer these in this space for a little while. If you’ve been thinking about it, now’s the time to do it.
Celebrating YOU,
by Tara Sage | Feb 23, 2023 | Coaching, Dream Acceleration, Tara Sage Coaching
Your goal is probably not your goal, and here’s why it matters – a whole lot!
“I want to lose 20 pounds.”
“I want a 6-figure business.”
“I want to get promoted.”
Goals, right?
Nope.
A goal is actionable.
These are examples of desired results, not goals.
This subtle distinction couldn’t be more relevant, or potent – that is, assuming you want to actually ACHIEVE them.
Here’s why.
Staying with the examples above…
Your goals need to be about building supportive healthy habits.
Your goals need to be about improving your skills and systems.
Your goals need to be about acquiring the credentials that will move you forward.
IF your desired result is to lose 20 pounds, your goals may, for example, include:
- Have a salad for lunch everyday
- Make intermittent fasting a regular part of your routine
- Do 50 sit-ups, 50 squats, and 50 pushups before breakfast everyday
- Run/walk 5 miles three times a week
- Eat fruit between meals
- Stop drinking your calories
- Put your fork down when you are full
IF your desired result is to have a 6-figure business, what behavioral changes and skill-building will help you achieve it? <<< Make these your goals.
IF your desired result is a promotion, what behavioral changes, skill-building, and credentials will help you achieve it? <<< Make these your goals.
Apply this to whatever desired results YOU are wanting.
You’ll have far more success if you set goals around the BEHAVIORS that will get you the desired result.
Create the habits. Learn the skills. Expand your abilities.
A goal is actionable. A desired result is just a desired result.
Ready to create not only your goals but your desired RESULTS? That’s exactly what I want to help you do. Take action with a free Assessment Call Session with me where we will look at how to turn your goals into results and go beyond where most people get stuck or quit.
Want one?
Click HERE to apply.
by Tara Sage | Feb 16, 2023 | Coaching, Dream Acceleration, Tara Sage Coaching
It’s what propelled Laurie to fulfill her dream to move to Costa Rica.
It’s what propelled David to make a major career shift so he could reprioritize time with his family.
It’s what propelled Friderike to double her income while growing her business in a way that felt fun.
It’s what propelled Janina to leave her corporate career and set out toward entrepreneurship, empowered with a new kind of confidence.
It’s what propelled Tom to make his acting career come alive.
It’s what propelled Lisa to launch her career as a professional organizer while also creating the time-freedom she so desired…
These are just a few examples.
I call it the Dream Acceleration Push-Pull Effect, and it can be dream-propelling jet fuel for the life you dream of … a life that, right now, perhaps you think you cannot have.
Here’s how it works.
Your deepest, truest, dreams and goals PUSH you out of your comfort zone. They inspire and push you to reach for what you want. (This, in a nutshell, is the Push Effect, and why it’s so important to get clear and stake a claim to your deepest, truest dreams and desires.)
And – the prospect of who you get to be, PULLS you. It PULLS you toward self-mastery. It PULLS you toward full-expression. It PULLS you toward self-actualization. It PULLS you into your potential, seducing and inviting you to step into BEING the Big You, to reach deep within yourself and develop into the person your dreams require you to BE in order for their fulfillment. It PULLS and compels you to grow.
The power of the Dream Acceleration Push-Pull Effect is NOT to be underestimated!
But it’s tough – sometimes impossible – to do it on your own.
Remember when I talked to you about curiosity last week? About building the muscle of changing your perspective, of seeing and bringing in POSSIBILITIES where none seemed to exist before?
This happens when we are in a space with the people that help us s-t-r-e-t-c-h.
We start to feel the benefits of this Push-Pull Effect when we are open to that kind of environment.
And that’s exactly what my clients do in our work together.
That’s exactly the kind of environment I create.
hirReady to find out for yourself?
Let’s do a Session with Tara, a free 1:1 assessment call where we will talk about your goals and your dreams and all the things that haven’t felt possible before, so we can get that dream-propelling jet fuel ignited for you, so that you can learn how to apply this for yourself to the life you dream of. You’ll walk away from our call not only with more confidence in your dreams and goals, but also with a roadmap to understanding exactly how to make them REAL.
To success on your own terms,
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