Are you making this goal setting mistake? 

Are you making this goal setting mistake? 

Today I want to pop in with a simple (but not always easy) goal-setting tip that can forever change a love-hate relationship with goals.

Which of these describes YOU best?

(A) I’m eager and enthusiastic when I set a goal, but once the initial motivation and enthusiasm subsides, I question. Maybe I didn’t really want it or it wasn’t realistic. So, I set a NEW goal, only to soon lose my mojo for that goal too.

(B) Goals feel like a constant reminder of what I haven’t achieved or might fail to achieve – so, to avoid risk of failure, I simply avoid goal-setting altogether.

(C) I do what it takes. I work hard and see my goals through but achieving them often isn’t nearly as gratifying as I thought it would be. Defeated and disappointed, I’ve wondered if this is all there is and question why I work so hard.

To help you make the most of the tip I’m going to give you, let me tell you a quick client story:

David, a client of mine, was a high-level bank executive who checked all the boxes of “success” – but was completely burnt out.

We decided to meet at a local cafe. He walked to my table, a clean-shaven man in a three-piece suit and shook my hand in a very formal way.

As we talked, David held onto his coffee cup like it was the only thing holding him up. He was weary, not just because his commute to his job was 90-minutes, one way, but because he had a secret. 

He hadn’t told his family how burnt out and unhappy he was. Because he didn’t want to let them down.

I asked him what he really wanted. 

He said, “I want to have more time with my family.” “I want to learn how to play the guitar.” And, then, sheepishly, David admitted, “I really want to grow my hair out.”

It was clear to me that the clean-shaven banker sitting in front of me was a free spirit, caged inside a pinstripe suit.

Whether you’re enthusiastic about goal-setting, or you avoid it… whether you do what it takes to achieve your goals, or you quit… a goal without a dream is a recipe for dissatisfaction. 

For the fulfillment of a goal to be truly satisfying, it needs to support what you TRULY want. 

Through our work together, David made the brave choice to tell the truth to his family. He told them how he felt and what he wanted and, as a family, they made some big shifts – to include him taking a pay cut and getting a new job, just 10 minutes from their house. 

He learned how to play the guitar.

And he grew out his hair. 💛

Any time you realize, as David did, that your goals aren’t aligned with your dreams, there’s the opportunity to dig deep and reorient toward what you actually want.

Do this honest assessment:

  • Are YOUR current goals on track with what you truly want? 
  • Do they support the realization of your deepest dreams and desires?

If not, it is time to reassess and determine what needs to shift so that they do.

The clearer you get on this now, the more likely you are to save yourself time, energy, and money in pursuit of goals that may fit cultural definitions of success or meet status quo expectations of others, but that YOU don’t really want.

My simple but not always easy goal setting tip for you today is this: 

When you set a goal, be sure you actually want it. 

Want to take this further and make today your “someday”? Grab a FREE copy of my Refreshingly Unconventional Goal Setting Guidebook to create REAL momentum on your dreams and goals.

Big love,