What I missed on the way to my dreams

What I missed on the way to my dreams

On a good day, I felt restless. On a bad day, I felt like a caged animal.

Exasperated, I came home from work to my dark, musty, basement apartment – a glaring reminder that I was not just figuratively, but literally, underground. Drowning in student loan debt, I rarely answered my phone because collection agencies were calling me daily. Trying to find my way in the world wasn’t easy. Emotional and practical baggage of difficult family dynamics and estrangement seemed to be hitting me all at once. I felt like a victim of circumstances, dealt an unfortunate hand, profoundly alone in my struggles.

The job I begrudgingly got at an Ivy League university to establish some stability, looked good on paper, but my soul was dying, a little more every day. If I had to sit through one more hour-long meeting that could have been communicated by an email, I was going to lose it. Things were done in inefficient ways for no reason other than it’s the way they’d always done it. This felt archaic to me, but rethinking conventions wasn’t welcomed or encouraged. Waiting for that clock on the wall to read 5:00 felt like an insult to my personal integrity and pride, not to mention that I’d finished my work hours earlier. And the starched button down shirt I wore, because I thought I should, felt like a straight-jacket, a costume that belonged to someone else – but not me.

I knew I couldn’t stay.

While going through the motions on all the things I thought I was supposed to do, I was losing myself. On autopilot, I’d drive to work, or the grocery store, or the gym (when I could get myself to go) feeling more and more disconnected from who I was. I wasn’t challenged. I wasn’t inspired. I felt contained, micro-managed, and caught in status quo games that I didn’t want to play.

I felt like I was drowning, and I knew no one was coming to save me.

Underneath my restlessness and frustration, was a growing sense that I was meant for MORE, that this couldn’t possibly be all I was meant to do, be, or have.

I knew I needed to take the reins and reshape my life, to reshape my reality, to figure out how to not live in a basement apartment forever, to create a life that was my own, that reflected the truth of who I was.

It was from that dark musty basement apartment, that I gazed out that teeny-tiny window with a view of the sidewalk and the tires of cars passing by … and I’d dream.

I dreamed of:

having the freedom to travel when and where I please
√ having my own location-independent company so that I could work from anywhere
a home with lots of natural light
becoming a bestselling author
wealth on my own terms
finding love
having time and energy for creativity and play
making a positive impact, serving others in meaningful ways that made their life better
being myself without boundaries.

The voice of my soul, and seeds of my own self-actualization, were surfacing.

There was a huge difference between the caged, soul-crushing, autopilot life I felt constrained and uninspired by, and my dreams. The problem was I couldn’t figure out how and where to find a bridge between the two.

A few things were missing, and when I finally figured those out, everything changed. Quickly.

What was missing was…

  • Self-trust
  • Belief that dreams my were possible – for not just other people, but for me
  • A way to see and transform my blind spots and expand my thinking

I needed to step up for myself, rather than waiting around for things to change, or others to approve. I needed to go from complaining about what my life currently was to becoming the person that COULD and WOULD move out of it.

What I needed to learn was…

  • How to manage my energy
  • What to do with fear
  • How to navigate naysayers

I needed the skills and support to take the REINS on my life, to listen to my heart, and really take ownership of the life I dreamed and envisioned for myself. To stop fear from running the show, I needed to get out of my head and shift my focus from all the seeming limits of my current circumstance to finding strategies and ways forward that I couldn’t yet see but chose to believe were there to be found.

What I needed to do was…

  • Get the right support
  • Take brave consistent action
  • Show up fully for what I was saying I wanted

I needed support from someone who’d been there. And perspective OUTSIDE what I’d already tried, a shift out of what had created the life I had, and into creating the totally different life I wanted.

So, I got support. And I changed my thinking. And I became a different version of me.

Spoiler alert: It worked.

Not only have I achieved my “impossible” dreams and the freedom I so craved, I have built a business and a profoundly fulfilling, decades-long, career around helping others rethink conventions, chart their own course, live their dreams, rediscover themselves, and realize what’s possible.

I help you create the life you think you cannot have. 

Your dreams, like mine, are fuel on your path to self-actualization.

The first step along the way to THAT life? Want the key to reclaiming what’s missing, to create everything you want for yourself, to finally make that change? >>> The Only Skill You Ever Need

xo,

P.S. Going after your dream life, finally living it, moving from your life now to the life you want to have – all of this can feel completely overwhelming! How do you know what you want? How do you GET what you want? Where do you start? How do you face all the uncertainty and that huge climb from where you are now to the life of your dreams?

There’s one skill that unlocks all the rest.

And my totally free and totally updated Only Skill You Ever Need guide and bonus chapter goes through exactly that.

Ready for that dream life of yours?

What stopped you this year?

What stopped you this year?

Naysayers have an unfortunate amount of influence over whether you live your dreams, for this one reason: Your own self-doubt.

How often do we do something, not do something, or change how we do something because of what people say? Or even what we THINK people will say?

Deferring to others is a symptom of innate self-doubt. And when the people you’re deferring to are naysayers or people who don’t want to see you make any changes, it can be the nail in the coffin for your dreams.

I know it may sound like I’m being overly dramatic. But unfortunately, in many cases, this is exactly what happens.

When people don’t receive approval or support from others about their dreams, it’s often at this very moment that their dreams die on the vine.

What can make naysayer navigation doubly hard is when it comes from the voices close to us.

This is why – if you want to not just dream, but LIVE those dreams – building self-trust and self-mastery is imperative.

Because when we fully trust OURSELVES and our own vision and desires, and when we trust ourselves to ACT and to BE, the words and opinions of naysayers, don’t stop us. We live our dreams.

It’s also why it’s so important to have a naysayer navigation plan so that the dreams in your heart don’t wither up like a raisin in the sun.

Look, if this stuff was easy everyone would do it!

The key is to align yourself with the right support while you grow in your ability to trust yourself. When you do this, you are strengthening the very foundation that your dreams and goals are built on: YOU.

While doubts and questions are normal and natural, most people stop right there.

But – this is 100% preventable. With the right support in your corner, this won’t happen because when doubts pop up, we bust through them right away. As we face each doubt and obstacle together, you’ll gain a growing sense of bravery, confidence, and self-trust. When old habits and default ways of thinking start sneaking their way back in and seem so real, together we will shine a light of TRUTH on those doubts and naysayer opinions and recognize and reconnect to what YOU want so you can step back into how you can create it.

It’s hard, sometimes even impossible, to do it alone.

Sticking with it, investing in support, and staying with the process are what is going to really set you apart .

Want to work with me? Apply now for my free Top Shelf Assessment Call.

Together, we’ll build that self-trust and self-mastery so that you can finally realize the life you are wanting.

Big love,

Tara Sage