I’ve been famous twice this week (+ a fun contest!)

I’ve been famous twice this week (+ a fun contest!)

I used to have a lot of head-trash about being seen, about being “big,” as in … “don’t get too big for your britches” … “you’re too loud/proud/bold” … “Who do you think you ARE?”

I wasn’t sure what “being famous” meant exactly, let alone if I wanted it. But if I did want it … was that BAD? Was I bad? Too showy? Who was I to think I could be famous for my work?

On the day my book came out, and quickly hit bestsellers lists, I cried – big, heaving, happy horse-tears. Having my labor of love, The Brules of Life books, PRINTED and in the hands of people across the country and around the world … was a big effing deal! It marked the culmination of an EXTRAORDINARY amount of work, focus, determination, heart, and grit.

From head-trash to brule breaker…

From largely unknown, to my name on a bestselling book…

And from being able to serve a small number of clients, to having a product that can reach – and teach – through a global marketplace…

It was a milestone indeed!

This week, my definition of “brule” (listed on Urban Dictionary) has more than 1,000 likes, and counting, and is listed first in “brule” definitions.

AND – even more exciting – my article, “Brules Are Made to Be Broken”, has been featured in the Dec/Jan issue of Aspire Magazine.

Every PR mention of “brules” and me, reaching many thousands of people, is cause for celebration. 😊

That said, it can also be kind of strange to have people I don’t know, who know me. Since some of the stories I share in my book are rather personal, they legitimately know quite a bit about me, so it makes sense that they feel that.

Like, last weekend, I attended a funeral with Carl, a celebration of life for the passing of his 105-year-old great-aunt. When we arrived, I was greeted by one of his cousins who I was meeting for the first time. She hugged me and told me she has my book.

It’s interesting to have my book precede me.

A few months ago, a friend and I went to see a band. While we were there, my friend ran into someone she knew. They were chatting away when the woman she was speaking to stopped, looked at me, and said, “Are you Tara Sage?” She knew my work.

It’s fun to learn that my work is reaching people that I don’t know or haven’t met.

Something you may not know about me is that I am child-free by choice. The older I get, this fact only further reinforces the depth with which my books and the ripple-effect of my work is, in large part, my legacy.

My books are a true extension of my heart. They are roaming the world, meeting people I’ve never met, and creating their own ripple-effect in the world-at-large. I’m proud of them. And I have more books to write. And MANY more people I aspire to serve with this work.

I want to leave this world feeling EMPTIED, having poured myself into what will outlive me.

My writing, my coaching, my message, my methods, my brule breaking no-BS teachings and how-tos are what really make this work come alive, in your LIFE.

I no longer shy away from the fact that, yes, I am KNOWN (which is essentially what I think “famous” means). And I want it for one simple reason: because this is HOW I am able to serve and teach and touch the lives of more people.

My books, my coaching, my thought leadership … These are the vehicles for how I empower and impact the lives of others and successfully realize the legacy of what I want to leave behind. (At 48-years-young, I’m just getting started!)

A FUN CONTEST ANNOUNCEMENT!

I want to make YOU (or someone you know) “famous” too!

I want to share and broaden the brule breaker spotlight. 😊 #BruleBreakerSpotlight

Who do you know that deserves a #brulebreaker nomination?

Who do you know who is a Brule Breaker? Consider, who do you know that does it their way, who questions the “this is just the way it is” or “this is just how I am” brules that they were given and creates their dream life, success, and more?

To nominate a brule breaker…  (and, YES, in true #brulebreaker fashion, you can totally nominate yourself, and YES, you can totally nominate more than one person!) – create a social media post with the hashtag #BruleBreakerSpotlight

In your post, tell me a bit about what makes them (or you) a trail-blazing brule-breaking march-to-the-beat-of-their-own-drummer standout! Make sure your post is set to PUBLIC (commenting under a post doesn’t count as a nomination, and posts that only your friends can see won’t qualify). Post it with the hashtag #BruleBreakerSpotlight so that I can find it.

On December 18th, I will select and announce one (maybe two) #BruleBreakerSpotlight winners!

Want to break the “don’t get too big for your britches” brule, and have your extraordinary BS-busting #brulebreaker self shared over the Interwebs for all to see and celebrate? Want a #BruleBreakerSpotlight profile on my blog and in my newsletter with links for where people can connect with you for more of your greatness? The #BruleBreakerSpotlight winner will ALSO receive a surprise “brules merch” gift-in-the-mail, and coupon good for 20% savings on one Brule Breakers Club annual membership for you or someone you know.

Every brule broken deserves to be celebrated. And we all want to celebrate and see YOU, Brule Breaker!

Get ready to be #BruleBreakerSpotlight famous:

  • Post a picture of The Brules of Life – it could be a picture you take, or you can reshare the “Nominate a Brule Breaker!” #bookpic that I am sharing with you here. (Bonus points if you add a video featuring your copy of The Brules of Life.)
  • Set your post to PUBLIC.
  • Tag me @tarasagecoaching along with the hashtag #BruleBreakerSpotlight with your nomination or story as to why you, or someone you know, is a #brulebreaker. Extra points for creativity, humor, boldness, and stories that warm the heart.

Here’s to unapologetically big britches,

Why I don’t call myself a business coach

Why I don’t call myself a business coach

I don’t call myself a Business Coach.

Even though I’ve been running my own company for nearly 20 years.

And even though I’ve coached numerous clients to create and build their businesses. 

Like Martha, who, when we first connected, felt she’d “already done the inner work to move beyond fear” and that “all she needed was nuts and bolts business development advice.” I helped Martha identify subtle beliefs that were holding her back from thinking bigger. We then rebranded the various aspects of her business into one unified message and expanded her product offerings. The result: In addition to feeling more confident as a business owner, fulfilled and aligned with her sense of purpose, Martha reported: “In my first year with Tara as my coach, my sales revenues increased by 117%. As of this writing, now in my second round of coaching with Tara, my first quarter revenues alone (during my quiet time of year) are up 46% over last year. Thanks to Tara, I’ve created a business that is unique to me and I have not had to compromise!“ 

^ From this testimonial alone, I could call myself a business coach.  

When someone is struggling in their business, it is completely understandable for them to think that a better social media marketer, or strategist, or new business coach is what is needed.

But – what my clients have found is that the real difference comes from a shift within THEM.

Another client, Cathie, dreamed of being a consultant for nonprofits, but she wasn’t clear on how to earn what she needed and attract the right clients while also maintaining the kind of work:life:family balance she wanted. Cathie and I mapped out her unique service process, packages, and plan (the 3 P’s) to create $240k in revenue, serving in a way that aligned with her “Big WHY” – all with just 7 client organizations and 4-day work weeks.

BUT – before any of this awesomeness was possible, her WHY needed to be clarified, she needed to learn how to manage her energy differently, and (perhaps most important of all) she had to self-identify as having what it takes to BE a successful business owner!

Her words: “Through Tara’s wise and focused support I have more energy than I’ve ever had, a clear plan to grow my business, more time to pursue a life outside of work, and I’ve learned to ask for and RECEIVE powerful support from other people. … Every day I wake up and am thrilled to be doing what I love! And I know there is so much MORE to come!”

Then there’s Friderike, who was able to double her income and generate her best revenue year ever! And, she added, “I didn’t kill myself in the process and had fun with it.” 

✴ Despite all of this AND the fact that people tend to be far more willing to pay top dollar for business coaching than life coaching, I still don’t call myself a Business Coach. ✴

Here’s WHY:

Because experience has taught me that you really can’t separate life coaching from business coaching, ESPECIALLY if the ultimate goal is a fulfilling and satisfying life.

And that’s certainly my goal for my clients. No matter who I’m coaching. 

But – in order for that to happen, life and business MUST work together. 

Yes, we strategize. Of course we strategize! Yes, we adapt and customize business models. And we most certainly create plans, test new approaches, and map out action steps – all to help ensure desired outcomes. 

But even more than THAT …  it’s the internal shifts, personal shifts in how you think, prioritize, and choose to spend your time and energy. This is what makes everything better, easier, bigger, and more powerful.

Businesses benefit from life coaching because business owners (like Martha, Cathie, Friderike, and numerous others), benefit from life coaching. 

Just as non-business owners benefit from life coaching.

When ‘the Business of Life’ thrives, YOU thrive.

Having the support of a skilled coach who knows how to create transformation within your personal psychology and help you live a fulfilling, impactful, joyful life creates a ripple effect, beneficial to every area of your LIFE – from your relationships, to your health, to your business, or whatever career path you may choose.  

Like Melissa, who shared that before connecting with me she’d “spent the majority of life doing things for all the wrong reasons.” Though she very much wanted success, she wasn’t sure where or how to focus her energy. Together, we uncovered a belief she had that was holding her back: that success was hard and that it meant sacrifice – none of which (understandably!) was how Melissa wanted to live. 

Upon realizing that her dream is not one particular passion but, rather, a passion for how she wanted to live (free to decide her own schedule, with autonomy and plenty of time for not just work, but for herself, her friends and her family) it became clear that real estate encompassed all the things she wanted out of a career, while also allowing her the freedom to live life the way she’d dreamed she could. In Melissa’s first year as a real estate agent, she made over $2.5 million in sales! And, to quote her, “the really amazing thing is … it felt effortless and FUN.” 

Having this kind of support on your side is invaluable and goes way beyond business!

Bottom line: None of this is unique to business owners. Whatever you’re up to, coaching together can help!

I am a coach who’s not afraid to ask the hard questions. I’m a coach who has an astutely attuned ear. I don’t let you stay on the track of old thought patterns and behavior patterns that aren’t serving you. Together, we stop, look at it, shine a light on it, name it, deconstruct it, and then implement new strategies and build new habits in those areas where a break in the old pattern is going to support you far better. (a.k.a. brule breaking)

It’s who I am. I see what goes unnoticed by most. As I learn your personal psychology, and I learn what your go-to behaviors are, and I see the default path that your thoughts and beliefs tend to follow over and over and over again, and I pinpoint the assumptions you make over and over again … opportunities for the applied psychology of change abound! 

That’s the fun part. 😊

Yes, your business may grow in the process. But that’s not ever going to be the primary measure of your success – or, frankly, mine. 

There’s one more piece to what really makes private coaching such a powerful combination: LOVE. I adore my clients. It’s why I don’t stand for them standing for their own BS. It’s why I lovingly help them see that. It’s why pattern interruption strategies are a must when what’s been happening isn’t serving. 

And, lastly, I believe it’s why my clients trust me to do the deep work. To tell me the truth, even when it’s hard or has shame attached to it. 

They know that I have their best interests at heart. They know I’m not here to judge them. In fact, in large part, what I do is help them understand how NORMAL what they are feeling shame about IS, and how wonderful it is that their bravery to share it anyway is already a break in the old pattern. 

With this shared understanding, and my decades of education, training, and tools for how to apply the psychology of change in a customized way, it then becomes easy to team up and help my clients effectively apply new practices and make new choices and see new possibilities that allow them to grow, to meet and exceed their goals, and make their dreams happen – business or otherwise. 

Are you next?

Go HERE to read the full testimonials of these clients and others, and, if you’d like, claim a complimentary Assessment Call so we can connect 1:1 and explore how I might serve YOU – and your professional goals and aspirations too. 😉

What I love about breakfast (besides the eating part)

What I love about breakfast (besides the eating part)

One key part of my mission is to turn complex behavioral and psychological concepts into suuuuuper accessible, user-friendly, easy-to-apply strategies that help you experience more joy and wellbeing in your life.

Because I love you and want you to thrive.

Because you don’t need to have studied this stuff for years or have degrees in behavioral psychology to learn from someone who does … that is, so long as that person (me) keeps it REAL and breaks things into simple, relatable, straight-talking micro-steps that make your life better.

So. That’s what I’m committed to.

With this said, can we talk about breakfast for a minute?

What I love about breakfast, besides the eating part, is that it’s a habit we ALL have.

Regardless of WHAT you eat. (This is not a message about your diet.)

Regardless of WHEN you eat. (Perhaps you fast until 2pm, or eat early. Do you.)

Unless you’re in the midst of a daylong fast … somewhere in the course of your day, I’m going to assume you, quite literally, break-fast.

From an applied psychology perspective, this is great news for two reasons:

  1. Because eating breakfast has built-in rewards … namely, that hunger gets satisfied, but also the pleasure of happy taste buds. (a.k.a. positive reinforcement)
  2. Because eating your first meal of the day is part of your routine. (a.k.a. conditioned behavior pattern, an established habit)

Here’s how this simple, daily, built-in habit provides you with a fabulous opportunity:👇

The behavioral and brain science is clear. Changing habits is most effective when you add a new habit (as opposed to trying to stop an old habit).

Let’s say, for example, that you aspire to:

  • read more books, or
  • build more physical strength, or
  • learn a new language, or
  • prepare more healthy meals, or
  • start a meditation practice, or
  • (fill in the blank with something that’s true for you)…

Since breakfast is an already established habit, it presents a PERFECT opportunity for you to add, in an effort to build on and establish more helpful habits into your routine.

For example, you might add …

  • 30 minutes of reading, or
  • 50 squats, or
  • a Duolingo lesson, or
  • making a big salad so it’s ready to eat for lunch, or
  • 10 minutes of meditation, or
  • whatever new habit will best support your goals

… all BEFORE you get rewarded by having breakfast.

To be clear, I recommend picking ONE thing you’ll add to your routine. ONE thing you decide you’re going to be sure to do BEFORE you eat breakfast. I also recommend doing it for at least 7 days, consistently, before considering adding any other new habits to the mix.

So, what supportive new habit will YOU add to your pre-breakfast routine? I’d love to hear!

Small changes add up. And small steps – if they’re the right steps – can be absolutely transformative: they build your confidence, they break old patterns, they free up energy, and they make you that much more ready and able to take on the bigger stuff.

Want to learn more ways to disrupt old patterns, build positive new habits, establish expansive new levels of empowerment, and experience a new kind of freedom in your life?

JOIN ME for my upcoming in-person special event where we’ll not only break bread, we’ll break brules! 😉 Click here to learn more and claim your seat at the table!

Big love,

 

Why I don’t often share personal things

Why I don’t often share personal things

Last week I announced that I’m doing a special in-person event.  At this event, one thing I’ll be sharing is a vulnerable story about a personal blind spot – one that I honestly only ever thought I’d share with my closest friends.

I’m scared and excited.

I don’t often share personal things in professional settings. So, it’s a really big deal for me and I’d be so honored if you want to come join in the experience with me.

Part of why I don’t tend to share personal things has to do with professional boundaries.

It’s a judgment call, of course. But sometimes I see others in my industry use the word “vulnerability” when sharing something that strikes me as a positive spin on what is actually just oversharing.

Just my opinion, of course.

But my point is – I’m careful about it.

Coaching individuals for decades has taught me a lot about what really helps people realize their dreams and goals. What I know is that helping people see blind spots and clear the mental and emotional blocks that are limiting them is far more effective, transformational, and lasting than telling people how to live or what to do.

When it comes to my professional life, I only ever want to share something vulnerable when I’m sure it has purpose. By this, I mean, I need to be sure it enhances a message or teaching in a way that wouldn’t be as potent without the personal story. I don’t just share to share or to demonstrate vulnerability for the sake of it.

I want to first feel sure it helps deliver something that has the power to change lives.

And, this time, after much reflection, I’m sure.

I think it’s going to be an amazing experience where I get to share with you and, if you choose, you get to share with me too. And together, we can walk away from this powerful gathering clear about what is going to have a big impact for each of us.

Shining a light on socially-steeped ideas that impede people from living full-out is what helps create swift and positive change.

Removing mental and emotional obstacles clears the path.

And this naturally activates the momentum needed to create more of what is desired in life.

As I allow the natural momentum around my mission (to revolutionize and optimize the human experience by helping people create the life they think they cannot have), I am trusting this next iteration of where I’m being led.

Brule breaking provides a fresh approach and framework to deconstruct and challenge limiting perspectives. It shifts unhelpful habits. Brule breaking builds expansive levels of awareness, and establishes new patterns so that you too can create the life you think you cannot have.

I hope you’ll join me. To claim a seat at The Brule Breakers Brunch in New England on September 23rd, click here.

Big love,